31st January (Thursday)

Well I'm finally a big Grade '12'.  It feels good but not much different really.  It was good to go back to school and see all my friends again.  I'm in two, maybe three classes with Karina which is really good because last year I wasn't in any with her.  I met the exchange student from Switzerland.  He's not exactly as cute as I hoped but I guess he's not really bad.  He's very, very, very tall and wears glasses.  His name is Nicholas.  He's from a French speaking area.

I found out today that Donna Willett was put off her part-time job because she'd turned 18.  I enjoyed going to work with Donna.

I'm going to try to get a part-time job at a hairdresser's and give up my job at the supermarket.  I'm hoping it'll give me a better chance of getting a full-time job there next year.  But I doubt I'll get a part-time job there, let alone a full-time one.

Mum rang Jan Myall this afternoon to see if her son, John, could start piano lessons on Monday.  I know she will be much more reliable than Mrs Flynn.

30th January 1985 (Wednesday)

Today I made a chef of myself.  I cooked a chocolate cheesecake, the same one we made at Joanne's.  Then I made the potatoes for tea.  I learnt a new way, also at Joanne's.

I start school in the morning.  I don't mind.  I'm looking forward to it really.  I'm also looking forward to asking Paul to partner me.  Only if he says yes!

29th January 1985 (Tuesday)

Mum went into town today.  I got her to get some things for my cooking tomorrow.  I've only got one day of holidays left.  It was Melissa's first day at high school today.  I drove down to pick her up from the bus stop.  She loved it.  It'll be good having her at the same school.  I've been to school for eleven years and only three have been at the same school as her.

I read the book Donna lent me today.  It was really good.  I read the whole book in one day.  Karina rang me today.  Right when I was cooking potato salad.  I burnt it!  Anyway she couldn't stop talking about Brad.  Their Rural Youth Group went on a camp on the weekend.  I was crying when she was talking to me.  She didn't know though.  She was saying how she thinks Brad's mum wants her to ask Brad to partner her for her debut.  It was really depressing me.  Mum rang Aunty Pat (Mason's mum) last night to see about him partnering me.  He's taken on a lot at uni so he probably can't do it.  So it looks like it'll be Paul Street (Eric's brother).  I really want him to, I think he's very nice.  He may not be able to do it because he goes to boarding school.  But he already knows how to dance so he wouldn't be disadvantaged if he missed a few practices.  Aunty Kaye (she & Leonie train the Catholic debs) said boys from boarding school have done it before so I hope he can.  Aunty Kaye was very sympathetic towards my finger.  She's really nice.  She's a terrific aunty.  I told her how I wanted Brad to partner me but Karina wanted him.  She told me to get in before Karina.  I like the way she says things like that.  Mum never would.

28th January 1985 (Monday)

Donna & Joanne made cushions for their beds today & I read a condensed novel from a magazine.  I'm home now.  I came home after tea.  I really enjoyed myself at Willett's.  Donna gave me a book to read & I wrote out a few recipes before I left.  They're all such good cooks down there.  Donna is training to become a Home Economics teacher.

27th January 1985 (Sunday)

We went up to the Tooradin store today to do some shopping for the cooking we did afterwards.  Mum rang to see when I was going home.  I told her about my finger and said it didn't look too good so she came down to have a look at it.  She used to be a nurse.  She said it would be alright and redressed it.  I'm having a great time down here.  We muck around all the time.  I wish I lived here.

26th January 1985 (Saturday)

Today I had fun.  I went to the ambulance.  I cut my finger on the meat slicer at at work.  It's not very bad but it's a good play for sympathy.  Although I push my luck at times!

We went to mass tonight in town and Eric was there.  I talked to him for awhile.  I asked him about Brad and he said, "You're not still chasing him are you?"  I don't know why he's telling me to forget him.  He wanted Brad and I to get together earlier on.  Donna, Joanne & I are sleeping outside tonight so we can gossip. 

25th January (Friday)

Aunty Kaye and Uncle Frank came down here for tea tonight so we made a cheesecake this morning.  Then we rang home to see if the boys and Melissa wanted to play tennis.  They did so we played tennis and then we played handball.  It was good fun.  They went home today.  We had to walk home on the road.  We only got one offer for a lift.  Of course we said no.  Then we cooked more when we got home.

24th January 1985 (Thursday)

I didn't see Peter Napier at all today.  I saw Paul & Peter No.2 for a little while.  I'm at Joanne's now and they're going home tomorrow so I won't see them for awhile.

I came down at about 1:30.  We rode the bikes up the back road and I killed my legs.  We played the piano and organ for awhile after that we had tea.  Everyone eats so fast down here and I'm always last by a long way.  How embarrassing.

23rd January 1985 (Wednesday)

Chris turned fourteeen today and we had a party for him.  But I'll get onto that later.

I was playing on the computer this morning and Peter came over to ask me to do some sewing for him.  I felt good that he asked me but I can't sew very well.  He wanted me to take down the hem from his long pants.  All I did was pin them, I got Mum to sew them.  Then he got me to cut his hair.  It's so short already and there was hardly anything to cut.  I just did what he said but I probably really ruined his whole lifestyle by cutting it wrong.  He said it looked better anyway.  We went swimming again today.  Peter didn't come for about an hour after we got there because he said, "The men needed my valuable assistance."

We had a nice BBQ planned for Chris's party.  We were going to have Nan & Kevin, Aunty Kaye, Uncle Frank, Peter, Paul & Peter No.2 along with Grandma, Grandfather & Dan (Mum's brother) who were coming out from town.  But Aunty Kaye and her group couldn't make it because they went to Aunty Kaye's friend's for tea.  And Grandfather had bookwork to do, so he couldn't make it.  And on top of all that, it stormed and washed out our barbie.

Ben, Chris & Natasha left with Grandma tonight.  They were beginning to get on my nerves so I'm glad they've gone.  Chris is OK but Ben & Natasha are pains.

22nd January 1985 (Tuesday)

Mum went into town today so I wrote a letter to Paul O'L before she went so I could get her to post it today.  It was a pretty dull letter!

Last night Geoff, Chris, Paul & Peter (Paul's friend) didn't go to sleep at all.  They got into big trouble this morning and weren't allowed to go swimming.  So us girls went with Peter Napier.  I'm getting on really well with Peter.  I don't mind at all that he only likes me as a friend.  It's just when he doesn't talk to me much that I get angry with him.  I like to be the popular person with eveyone talking to me.  But everyone has dreams.

Joanne rang me today and asked me down to her place for a few days.  I'm going to Thursday after lunch.

21st January 1985 (Monday)

Today was really great.  I didn't see Peter until we went swimming at about 2:30.  We were down there for about an hour and a half.  I was talking to Paul for awhile about David and he's a real little sweetie.  He's so cute.  Takes after his big brother, David.  Then a mud fight started.  Geoff, Chris, Ben, Paul, Peter (Paul's friend) & Natasha against Peter Napier.  Melissa & I were smart enough to just watch.  Then when Peter got back in the water we had a really good talk.  I'd forgotten what it was like to really talk to him.  We used to talk alone for a long time every time he came up but lately he has been neglecting me, and with six boys and three girls here at the moment he doesn't usually spend any time with us.  After swimming he asked us to go to Aunty Kaye's place so we did.  He had a bad headache and Aunty Kaye had no Panadol so we had to come back here for that.  Then he came into my bedroom and stayed here for over an hour.  I cleaned his toenails and cut them for him.  I like doing things for him.  Then he tried to go to sleep.  But I wouldn't let him.  Then Paul & Peter (the other one) came over to collect him.  We all played pool at Nan's tonight with the exception of Mr Napier who went to sleep right after dinner.

20th January 1985 (Sunday)

Not much happened today but I did a lot of thinking.  We went swimming at the river and Peter pushed me under and I got a nose full of water.  I got in a stink but it didn't last long.  We went to mass at Ridgehaven tonight.  Mum was talking about deb partners again.  She told me to ring Mason but I said I didn't want to so she said she would.  She didn't today but she will.  I asked her about Eric but she said he was too young.  Then I asked about Brad but she said to ask Mason first.  I hope Mason says no because I want Brad but I bet Brad would say no, too.

19th January 1985 (Saturday)

Kelly was finally at work this morning.  And her hair is the same as mine!  We both changed it the same way without each other knowing.  Yoko came in to see me this morning.  She gave me Paul's address.  Anyway, enough of that rubbish.  On to the good stuff.  Of course it's about the dance.  Brad did go but he completely ignored me all night.  Eric didn't know why.  I was talking to Eric a great deal tonight and had two dances with him.  Eric is very, very, very nice.  I really like him.  But no more than a friend.  I was really depressed when Brad ignored me.  I was so upset I could have cried BUT beautiful Bryant came in and asked me for a dance.  Then I forgot all my worries about Brad because Bryant gave me all the attention I wanted.  I've like him for about two years (that is, when I see him).  David Barrett's younger brother Paul and his friend Peter have been at Aunty Kaye's since Friday and they went to the dance.  I had two dances with Paul but during the second dance with Paul, Bryant got Melissa up so we swapped partners and I got to dance with Bryant.  He's so gorgeous.  Will Roley went and he really likes Jo.  He gave me a sweet smile and said hello but I looked the other way.  I had a total of 8 dances tonight.  One with Peter Napier, one with Matt, two with Eric, one with an old bloke, two with Paul B AND most importantly one with Bryant.

18th January 1985 (Friday)

I rang Jo today to tell her some good news.  Peter is coming up tomorrow.  He'll be going to the dance tomorrow night so she'll see him there.  I can't wait until the dance.  It better be good.  In other words, Brad better go!

17th January 1985 (Thursday)

We went to Brisbane today to pick up our cousins, Ben, Chris & Natasha.  They'll be staying for about a week.  We went swimming when we got home.  We also bought two more computer games.  One can only be played with a joystick so we'll have to buy one.  I kept my hair the same (which is different from usual) and everyone seems to like it so I'll probably keep it like this although I am getting a bit sick of it.  Natasha's sleeping with me while they're here so I have to hurry while I'm writing my diary.

16th January 1985 (Wednesday)

I rang Karina today and Arlene was there, too.  Karina is going out to Brad's place tonight to watch a video.  She's so lucky!  I wish I saw him as much as she does.  We talked about deb partners and I told her I wanted Brad but so does she.  I feel like asking him at the dance this weekend but I'd have to ask Karina if she minded and she would so I won't get to ask him.

I changed my hair today.  I brushed it over to the side.  I like it and Melissa said she likes it better but I don't know whether to keep it like this or not.  Brad might not like it and that's really my only concern.  Everything about Brad is confusing me.  The more I think about it the more confused I get.  I wonder if Brad will ever like me and I think about both answers but I can't come up with a conclusion.  Sometimes I wonder why I like him at all, I hardly know him.  It seems like all my depression is for nothing.  But I do like him.  I can't help it.  I wonder what he's doing now.  I wonder what Karina is doing.  She's probably glad to be near him but upset that he's not treating her the way she wants him to.  That's how I feel whenever I'm with him.  It's the fact that he's so close yet unobtainable that depresses me.  I feel like he's torturing me.  I hate it and I wish he meant nothing to me then I wouldn't be hurting like I am now.  I'm sure he'll be the same at the dance but there is that slight chance.  I hope Eric goes.  He pushes Brad along a bit.  I just hope he doesn't push too hard or my chance will be no chance.

15th January 1985 (Tuesday)

We went into town today, Mum, Melissa and I.  Melissa was really getting on my nerves.  I'm glad I went though because I saw Karina and Arlene.  I spoke to them for a few seconds because Mum was in a hurry.  But then I saw them again when Mum was in the supermarket so I was talking to them for quite awhile.  I wish more people liked me.  I mean genuinely liked me.  I feel very lonely and as if no one cares about me.  Karina wanted to stay and talk to me but Arlene kept saying she wanted to leave.  She doesn't like me but I wish she would.  I like her.  On Sunday in the pool I was right on the edge and the others were throwing a ball around.  Arlene threw it and it hit me on the face.  She must have meant it because it would have been easy to miss.  I wasn't even in the way.  The others didn't seem to worry too much.  At least the Streets talk about me in their home, Arlene was telling me Mrs Street told Brad that Karina was older than him (by 24 days) and she said, "Wouldn't it be funny if Tara was older than you because she's such a little thing and you're such a big thing."  I keep asking myself what I did so Brad doesn't like me.  I might think too much of myself and he may not like that, although I never mean too.  There must be some reason because Erick was so sure he liked me.  And I can't think of any reason why Eric would lie to me.  I really want Brad to partner me for my debut.  But I can't ask before Karina does or she'll never speak to me again.  And I value her friendship too much for that.  But if she asks and he says no, there's no reason he'd say yes to me.  Brad's the only person I want as a partner but I never usually get what I want and this time won't be any different.  There's a dance on this weekend at Tooradin.  I really don't know whether to go or not.  I want to see Brad but not if he doesn't particularly want to see me.  I guess I will go though because there's always a chance something may happen and I'm not one to pass up on a chance, especially where Brad is concerned. 

14th January 1985 (Monday)

Last night after I wrote my diary Mum came in and suggested I should ask Paul Street to partner me for my debut this year.  I told her I don't really know him very well and he goes to boarding school.  She said I could get Mason to do it then.  I really want Brad to do it but Karina told me she wants to ask him first.  And so he'll partner her but if he says no he'll say the same to me.  So there's no way I'll get Brad as my partner.

Last night I couldn't stop crying about what didn't happen yesterday.  I was so disappointed.  Joanne rang me to see how the party went but I couldn't say much because Mum was in the room.  I'll ring her back sometime this week.

Mum made herself a skirt and tried it on in my room.  Then she told me to try it on.  It fitted me and she asked me if I wanted.  So I've got a new skirt.

I wrote a very personal letter to Brad today.  I'm not going to give it to him, I wouldn't dare!  I just poured out my feelings into it.  I like him so much but that doesn't make any difference to him.  He didn't say he only wants to be friends, but I'm not stupid.  You could tell a mile away he's not interested.  Not even slightly.   Eric has got to be the biggest liar I've ever met, by far.  I think it was very cruel to say Brad likes me when he knows he doesn't.  Why would he say such things?  Maybe he hates me and he's doing it to hurt me.

13th January 1985 (Sunday)

Well today wasn't what I hoped for but it was what I expected.  I'm so depressed that I'll cry myself to sleep tonight.  I went into Karina's place at 9:30 this morning and we started writing a letter to Ann.  Then we went down to the newsagents to buy a card for Paul from Karina.  Then Rick & Brad came at about 10:15.  Brad was as gorgeous as ever.  Anyway we were walking down to the car, Karina first then me, then Brad.  I went around to the other side of the car because I knew Karina wanted to middle.  But Brad followed me around so I ended up in the middle and sat next to Brad all the way to Paul's.  I thought, "This is great!".  But that was all he did that could possibly mean he likes me.  We got to Paul's place too early, so he told us.  It wasn't a very good party.  Paul practically said nothing but hello to us all day.  But it wasn't Paul I was worried about.  Brad was talking to me but he never showed any more interest than a friend.  I didn't eat anything at Paul's place because I hate eating at other people's places and I wasn't hungry anyway.  After lunch someone suggested we go swimming at Brad's place (his grandma owns a pool and they live right next to them).  I was all for that except I had no togs but Karina said Arlene (Brad's sister) would have a pair that would fit me.  So we said goodbye to Paul and went back to Karina's.  (Karina sat in the middle this time).  I rang Mum and she said I could go swimming.  So we went out to Rick's place to get his things.  Then we went to Brad's place and I got changed there.  Then we went up to his grandparents' place.  It was fun swimming.  But Brad didn't say much to me.  Anyway we had to be back in town by 5 because I had to go to mass tonight.  We got changed at Brad's place again.  I saw his baby photo and it's so cute.  Then we said goodbye and went back to Karina's again.  I rang to tell Mum to come & get me then we finished Ann's letter.  When I got home we had tea which was good because I ate absolutely nothing between breakfast & tea.  I haven't done that for ages.  Then we went to mass at Hilldale.  Amber came too.  I was very tired in mass and also disappointed.

I like Brad so much.  He's very nice and he's real funny.  But Eric must have been lying.  For someone who's supposed to like me he sure shows it strangely.  I guess there is a possibility that he may like me but I'm being very optimistic.  Karina and I both think he's terrific.  I only wish he felt the same about me.

12th January 1985 (Saturday)

Kelly wasn't at work again today.  I don't know why she's been away for so long.  I might ring her.  I was sun-baking today and got very burnt.  My face didn't though.  I'm glad because I don't want to be red at Paul's party tomorrow.  Mum bought a card, badge & keyring for me to give to him.  I rang Karina to see what she's wearing tomorrow.  She wasn't sure.  I was going to wear shorts but I don't want everyone to see my red legs so I'll wear a skirt.  I've got nothing good to wear.  And I want to impress Brad.  I can't wait to see him again.

11th January 1985 (Friday)

Joanne went home this afternoon and Melissa came home & brought Amber with her.  I'm glad Joanne came up.  I like it when she comes up but she really must have been so bored because we did nothing.  Today we swam on the trampoline for awhile and we played pool & watched TV.  Karina rang me today.  She didn't ask me to stay at her place but she did ask if I still wanted to go down to the party with them.  And, of course, I said yes.  She had to ask me a question though.  It was, "Can I sit in the middle on the way down?".  I said yes because I don't want to push my luck.  I'm really hoping Brad will ask me to sit in the middle but as if.  I'm dying to go to this party but Karina said she heard that some 'tough' grade 12 boys are going to gatecrash for a stir.  That will ruin the whole day if they do.  Karina & I decided not to buy Paul a present.  Mum thinks I should but I don't want to be the only one.  We'll probably just buy him a card.  I wonder what Brad will say to me on Sunday.  I hope he's really nice to me and he really likes me.  But I've got high hopes.  I suppose I'd better go to sleep.  I'm very tired.  The heat wears me out.  And I have to work in the morning.  Kelly had better be there this week.  I'll be very bored if she isn't.  And I want to tell her all my 'exciting' news.  (Real exciting!)

10th January 1985 (Thursday)

Joanne must be so bored here because we did absolutely nothing today apart from swim in the river for about an hour & we played the piano again.  But I guess it's better getting bored at someone else's place than your own.  Karina didn't ring today.  She's only got tomorrow left if she's going to ask me to her place.  Mum asked me today about a present for Paul.  I said I'd talk about it with Karina.  So if she doesn't ring me, I'll ring her.  I can't wait until Sunday.  I'm dying to see Brad again.

9th January 1985 (Wednesday)

I got Joanne the stupid, dull, brat, dumb, pain friend of mine up today (she told me to write bad stuff about her).  I am really only joking.  We were swimming on the tramp today.  I was trying to get brown but Joanne doesn't have to.  She's brown enough.  After that we were just mucking around.  Mum wants us to play a duet on the piano at this year's speech night.  So we played a couple and picked one out.  Tonight was the best though.  I was taping songs and we were going crazy dancing.  And by crazy I mean C-R-A-Z-Y!!!!!!!!  Especially Joanne, she's a bit weird you know.  Strange person.  That's why we get on so well.

8th January 1985 (Tuesday)

This morning I asked Mum if I could get Joanne up for a few days.  She amazingly said yes.  So I rang Joanne but she couldn't today because they are having guests for dinner tonight.  But she's coming tomorrow morning and probably staying until Friday.  We talked for about 2 hours.  That was because it gave us both something to do for once.  Melissa asked her friend Amber to come up today but instead she's going to her place for a few days.

I spent the rest of the day doing nothing much.  I made up my face and put my new dress on, did my hair and danced in my room.  That tells you how bored I was!  Then Melissa came in so I did her face & hair.  Then she did mine (I'd taken off what I did).

You've probably noticed I haven't said anything about Brad...yet.  I thought about him a bit today and I'm crazy about him but there's no use upsetting myself by spending all day thinking about him.  I'd probably just get my hopes too high and be disappointed on Sunday.

7th January 1985 (Monday)

I was so happy yesterday about Brad.  But it usually takes me about a day or so to realize the truth.  Brad doesn't like me.  Did I really think that someone who was interested in me would sit beside me all night and barely speak to me?  Today I was really very upset and just moped about the house all day.  I rang Karina but she likes Brad, too, so I really can't say very much to her.  Eric kept telling me Brad is very interested but Karina seems to think the opposite and tells me so.  I told Karina what Eric asked Brad but I only said me & Sandy.   I didn't want to hurt her by saying he likes me better than her.  But I don't think he does.  I feel like ringing Eric and having a really good, long talk about everything Brad has said about me.  But it would probably be a short talk if that was the subject.  I really want to go to Karina's place at the end of the week.  She said if I do I could go down to Paul's party with Rick, Nerida, Karina AND most importantly Brad!  That's not the only reason I want to go.  I do want to see Karina, too.  But after I told her he liked me better than Sandy she didn't sound like she wanted me to come anymore.  I don't think she had any idea that Brad even slightly liked me.  I really don't know what to think because Eric always talks to him and he says Brad likes me but Karina stays at their place (she's good friends with Brad's sister) and she doesn't think he's interested.  She might be saying it out of jealousy but if he really did like me he would have probably made it a little more obvious at the dance.

Yoko rang me today and said something about the letter being stupid, but she was positive Paul gave her the card.  But who cares?  All I could think about all day was Brad again.  It's really getting me down.  I like him so much but does he care?  I don't think so.  I can't wait to see him on Sunday and I hope something happens.  I want to get Joanne up for a few days.  I need someone to talk to badly.  I just make myself more depressed if there's no one around.  I really want to ring Eric because I simply must know what Brad thinks of me.  This time (unlike any other) I'm not going to do anything stupid to ruin all my chances.  I'm going to let Brad make all the moves, if he's got any he wants to make.  Karina says that's why he doesn't like me, he doesn't like being chased, he wants to do the chasing, if there's any to be done.  I won't be able to stop thinking about him so you'll have to put up with me until I see him again (that includes you Jo).  Joanne is the only one I let read my diary.  She was the only one that knew about it, too, until my sister found out!  I like to keep it a secret because I'm afraid the rest of the family would try to read it if they found out.

6th January 1985 (Sunday)

Today was so hot.  It was 36oC at 10:45 this morning!  But we got a few big storms in a row at about 1:30 to 2:00 so that cooled things down a bit.  We went to mass at Ridgehaven tonight and there was a huge crack of thunder.  Everyone almost died of fright.

Aunty Marie, Uncle Warren, Natasha, Uncle Warren's mother and her brother and his wife all arrived at our place unexpectedly today.  Ben & Chris didn't come, they're in Adelaide.  They didn't stay for very long.  About 3-4 hours.  Aunty Coralie brought an old friend from school up to Nan's today, too.  Owen & Trent didn't come because they were doing something with Uncle David.

I couldn't stop thinking about Brad at all today.  I can't wait to see him again.  And I wish he really, really liked me.  I don't think he does but I wish he would.  I kept thinking about him and the dance all day.  He's so nice, cute, gorgeous, funny, tall, great, etc.  I really like him a lot.  More than Paul O'L.  Paul doesn't talk to me all that much.  When he does he says things that make me think he likes me but then he goes and talks to someone else all night.  Brad sat with me all night and he's much better looking than Paul.  He doesn't think himself great like Paul does and he's very nice!!  Eric is really good.  He talks with Brad and I think he did a lot of good but he keeps stirring Brad around me and it annoys Brad.  Last night Eric said, "Where are you going to send your  kids to school?"  Brad wasn't impressed.  I can't wait until Paul's party.  Then I'll find out more about how Brad feels about me.  I hope he likes me.  I couldn't be happier if he does.

5th January 1985 (Saturday)

It's only 5:45pm but I have quite a bit to write and I don't want to leave it all until after the dance tonight.  Kelly wasn't at work again this morning.  I worked with Donna Craig this time.  She's good to work with.  We get along well.  Donna Willett drove me in this morning.  Mrs Willett didn't come.  On the way home Donna was telling me her problems with a particular guy.  Of course I feel sorry for her, but it make me feel better to know I'm not the only one.  Paul T. came into work this morning.  He didn't talk to me, he just waved.  Nick Saxby came into the deli this morning and lent right over me and said into my ear, "How are you this morning, Tara?"  I liked that.  Mr Myer's son has been working in there lately and he kept looking at me this morning.  Probably because I'm so ugly.  Grandma came down to me at work to give me our family presents from our cousins' grandma in Brisbane.

I went to sleep when I got home and the phone woke me.  It stopped ringing so I thought someone must have answered it.  I felt sure it was for me and was surprised when no one came to get me.  So I went back to sleep.   Then the phone rang again.  I couldn't be bothered answering it but it kept ringing so I got up to answer it, but, you guessed it, it stopped just as I reached it.  Anyway it was for me.  Karina rang back ten minutes after that last call.  She rang to see if I was going to the dance.  She's going, too.  She had quite a good deal of news for me.  Paul Zimmermann likes her and now she knows how I felt about Paul T.  She also said Yoko rang her just before she rang me, asking for my phone number.  So that must have been the first caller.  I knew it was for me.  But she still hasn't contacted me.  I wish she would.  I have to ask her about that letter.  Just after Karina rang Grandma rang with good news.  Mum's brother in Sydney, Uncle Carl, has a son.  That's two now, Laura and this new baby.  Now I have seven cousins.  Five are boys and two girls.

I can't wait until the dance tonight.  It should be good if lots of people I know go.

(Night)

The dance was unreal.  It was one of the best ever.  I was surprised when Eric came up to me almost as soon as he came in and talked to me.  He asked me up for a dance.  So that was dance number one.  We had a really good talk about Brad.  He said he was talking to Brad and asked him who he liked best out of Karina, Sandy and me.  I was very surprised and happy to hear he chose me.  Then Brad asked me for two dances in a row.  I love dancing with him, he's so tall and big.  He's 6'1 1/2".  I just seem to disappear in his arms when I dance with him.  I am only 5'2".  I feel really comfortable dancing with him.  After the second dance he sat beside me for the rest of the night.  If he does like me, he's a very slow mover.  He hardly spoke to me and I wish he would have held my hand or something.  Paul O'L was there, too, but he wasn't sitting with us.  When he first came in he said it was good to see me again, that he hadn't seen me for ages.  That embarrassed me and I didn't know what to say.  Roselise also went and Paul hadn't personally invited them (her & Karina) to his party so I had to ask him if they were invited.  He said of course and Brad asked if he could go.  Paul said yes so it should be great!!  Even better, Karina's sister Nerida and her boyfriend Rick are going and will be taking Karina and Brad, and I might be going with them!  Brad has the most gorgeous blue eyes.  He's really adorable.  For my fourth dance,  Matt Stetson got me up.  He used to like me but I did nothing about it so he has another girlfriend now.  Anyway, he got me up in the Progressive Barn Dance.  I progressed onto Paul O'L and he said,
"You look very pretty tonight."
I said, "Yeah, sure," sarcastically.
He said, "No, you really do, very pretty."
And I said, "I doubt it."
Then we came to a waltz in the dance and the floor was very crowded and we were squashed and he pulled me very close to him and said, "Oh, I like this."

I mentioned that at the last dance Benny Schneider was there.  Well tonight both Benny and Byrant went.  I danced with Bryant in the progressive barn dance and said hello but I didn't think he recognized me.  He obviously did because he asked me for a dance.  The same way he always used to.  It was the Rockabilly and he just kept looking and smiling at me.  He used the same antics he did about 2 years ago and I said, "You're still the same."  He just looked at me innocently and said, "Who? Me?"  I think he liked it when I said that because he smiled at me even more.  He's got the most gorgeous crooked smile.  Karina was angry with me a usual.  My first two dances with Eric and Brad made her very angry and I didn't know why until she said, "Not only do you steal one, but two!"  She still likes Brad and Eric.  I didn't know.

I asked Paul about the letter and he said it must have been from someone else.  I still don't understand but it doesn't bother me that much anymore.  Paul also thanked me very much for the Christmas present I gave him.

Overall the dance was fantastic, great, unreal, fun and I got plenty of attention from all the guys I wanted.  That really made my day.  (Just in case you're wondering, I like Brad the most.  Definitely!!)

4th January, 1985 (Friday)

At least I did something again today rather than sit at home and be bored.  I went into town with Mum.  I didn't see anyone I knew.  I got more of my reading books for English.  After Mum had finished her shopping I decided to get my hair cut.  This was at quarter to one and the next appointment was for one-thirty, so we went up to Grandma's.  My cousin, Natasha, is up there at the moment.  Anyway, when I went back to the hairdresser I said I wanted it different but I didn't know how.  So she just cut it shorter at the sides and trimmed it at the back.  It's not really very different but I like it anyway.  I cut Geoff and Melissa's tonight, too.  So we all had a haircut today.

3rd January, 1985 (Thursday)

Today we went visiting.  We went to see a good friend of Mum's since she was at school.  Their names were Sharon and Errol Jones.  They have 3 children, Paul, Belinda and Katrina.  Paul, the oldest is the same age as Michelle, our youngest.  We had dinner there and just got home at 11:30pm!  They live in Brisbane.  They're really lovely people.  I didn't really want to go but now I'm glad I did.  Katrina wasn't there today.  She was staying with a friend.  They have a video and we hired "Mr Mom".  I've seen it before at Ann's birthday party.  It's very funny (especially when it's being rewound).

Before we left, which was about 3:30, I mainly read one of my books for English.  I figure I won't have much time to read them after school starts so I'll read them now.  Besides, I like reading.

The painter came back to finish off today and brought his two, brat daughters with him.  Talk about make themselves at home.  We've never even seen them before.  They stayed inside, supposedly watching TV after we left, but Melissa thinks they may have gone through stuff in her room.

2nd January 1985 ( Wednesday)

I nearly fried alive today.  It was boiling!  It must have reached 40o.  Anyway, we solved that problem by going swimming.  Aunty Kaye's sister and her family are up for a few says.  She has two boys, Scott & Andrew.  They're both younger than Geoff.  Scott & Geoff are great mates.  They came swimming with us too.

I got a letter from Yoko today which has really got me confused.  When I gave her her Christmas Card (at school) I had written on it "Sorry for all the trouble I cause you" at the term dance.  But in the letter she said -

"Anyway he (Paul) then gave me your New Year Card.  So that's mainly why I'm writing to you now.  Thank you so much for it.  You are a very sweet friend.  I know I'll miss you in Japan.  I don't know why you gave it to Paul and why you said that you were sorry to have caused me trouble" etc, etc.

I really can't understand how my Christmas Card which I gave to her in person turned into a New Years Card given to her by Paul.  I'm really worried about it.  How on earth did Paul get it.  I'm sure I gave it to her.  I wouldn't have given it to Paul, I'm sure!

Tagged - 10 Things that Make Me Happy (This is NOT part of the diary)

Well here's an interesting little challenge...

Naomi at Under The Yardarm has tagged me to list 10 things that make me happy.
So I'm going to try to get back into the head space of myself 25 years ago...let's see how I go...

1.  Getting good marks for my assignments and exams.

2.  My friends saving a seat for me on the school bus.

3.  Mum picking us up from the bus so I don't have to walk up the hill.

4.  Summer and sun baking until I'm brown.

5.  Christmas with the whole family, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents.

6.  Going on family holidays at the Gold Coast.

7.  Sitting in the same seat as Joey Perrone on the Corkscrew at Sea World!!

8.  Getting letters.

9.  Listening to music and learning all the words to my favourite songs.

10.  Feeling like I am trendy and NOT a dag.

And now I am meant to tag 10 more people to do the same, I only have 7, hope that's OK.
Not sure if all of these people still read the diary but here's who I'm tagging...


emlykd the strange
an aussie in auckland
Mummy Mayhem
Life and Other Crises
So Now What?
My stupid and insignificant rants
Wisdom of the Pretty Kitty

1st January 1985 ( Tuesday)

Today, of course, was New Year's Day.  I had a great time at Aunty Pat's and Uncle Henry's.  We played computer games which is fun, then we went swimming in a creek near their place.  It's a really deep hole, like ours at the river.

We also went to mass tonight at Littleview.  In the past 2 weeks I've been to mass 4 times.  Joanne went but I didn't get much chance to talk to her because another friend, Wendy Harvey, came over and started talking to me.  I still have to get Joanne up but every time I ask Mum she just says, "Sometime."